I enjoyed my first rewrite of essay two more than the
original write up of it. It was great because I already had most of my ideas
fleshed out, so when I did go back and do the rewrite, I got to play around
with the wording and expand on ideas that I had either missed or not properly
fleshed out the first time around. It was easier, after taking a small break
from the essay, to look at it objectively, see what needed to be changed, or
cut, or added throughout the paper.
I marked a part near the beginning of my essay that you had
marked on my paper. The note confused me when I looked back on it, so I left
the section in the rewrite so I could get more clarification on the problem with
it.
I'm really excited for the final draft of this essay. I feel like it has so much potential, and I'm just scratching the surface of it.
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